The Kind Of Day You Can't Wash Off

What a week.

A nasty viral something causing large amounts of sneezing, coughing and snottiness came upon me and my children. The stomach bug is still making the rounds at school. One morning a little guy produced such foul things, it pushed my buttons and I spent a few seconds retching. I'm a nurse. I don't retch. But I did. The unrelenting mucous forced me to take my Zyrtec-D. Joe begged me not to do it. But I did. By the end of that day I'd picked a fight with a co-worker who happens to be the most unstable person I know anymore. And if you can believe it, we tied up over the sale of candygrams to benefit Relay For Life. And then the candy showed up a day late and I had to tell over 300 elementary school children they had to wait to profess their undying love for their BFF until Monday!

I've had trouble staying awake in the evenings because of the antihistamines and wine. The house isn't looking so great. My office isn't either. I've been so irritable. Joe confirmed that by saying, "Why don't you go to bed? You're very irritable and I can't handle you, the kids and your irritability all at once." The man speaks the truth. And I've been loopy. I spent way too much time on Thursday figuring out the laptop and brand new speakers weren't broken. I tried desperately to turn the volume up and just couldn't! I could barely hear my itunes! Then I realized the music wasn't coming from my computer at all. It was the radio beside the bed playing. Opening a can of beans was virtually impossible. I berated the old broken down opener. Then I noticed the can was the pull tab variety. Which sort of brings us back full circle to the irritability. 

It snowed Wednesday night. It was picturesque. It was breathtaking. I felt renewed for a couple of hours then around 2 am, Sam was crouching naked in the corner of the kitchen and laughing maniacally. I put him back to bed. More stripping, more laughing, more Tom & Jerry theme music and finally naked and wrapped burrito fashion in a pink fleece blanket and lying in the hallway. I was up all night. He was terrible the next day at school. Which might explain my loopiness on Thurday. No more Benadryl for him will be more Benadryl for me.

Friday sucked the hairiest balls of all. Friday was something nasty in the woodshed. Friday will stick with me forever. I can't talk about it due to legalities so I will just ask you to love your children extra-special hard. Love hard and you won't ever have to hit hard. 

Now I am ready to share some good news. 

Something fun. Something bright. 

Let's see what I can find....

Reefer Madness

There have been moments in my life when I was faced with important, life-changing decisions. My choices have, at times, been poor and the outcomes even poorer. I admit to dropping the ball here and there. But this has never happened to me. I'd like to know who I should thank for that.

Karma. It's a bitch when it laces your stolen reefer brownies with paranoia and an overall sense of dread. Obviously, Officer Sanchez never saw the funniest episode of Roseanne EVER!

Shock And Awe And Then Some

Joe was home with us for the past four days in a row. We went into full out celebration mode. We danced and sang and poured platters of Four Happiness and Happy Family all over our naked bodies and the days seemed (mostly) golden. Of course, it could've been the sauce that created the illusion.

Okay, so we didn't really do anything weird with the Chinese food. But amazing things happened, nonetheless. Joe did the chores while I twiddled my thumbs. He tended the children while I stared off into space. He also managed to play golf, twice. We attended dinners and cookouts. We had surprise drop-in company. The kids were able to thoroughly enjoy two of their favorite things- fireworks and a parade. So, a good time was had by all, believe you me. There is no denying it. We've been on a Goodtime Bender.

I awoke this morning and on my way to make my 10 o'clock mimosa, I fell into a bucket of ice cold Monday.