I Am Me And I Am Okay

So, hear me out on this one. I'm about to share again.

As a teenager, I was not the most confident person. My conquer-the-world kind of boldness was a farce. I was very uncomfortable around people and to compensate, I made sure I was the life of the party. I had a number of straight and narrow friends at school who seemed to enjoy my company and included me in their lives but I just never seemed to be like anyone else. When I was sixteen, I started waiting tables with some people who were in their 20's. We all worked together and over time, we became friendly and they introduced me to a number of dangerous practices. Some of these became habits that have resulted in a life long struggle for me. I gathered some sense of confidence from such things and for a time, I believed that these people were just like me and I them. I belonged to something.

Unfortunately, it was a group of ne'er-do-wells who did not have my best interest at heart. And it wasn't long before many things came crashing down around me. I found myself in my senior year of high school and just as lost as a goose. My self esteem was at an all time low. My parents had no idea of the extent of my troubled thoughts. And now looking back, I wonder why I was so unhappy then, when life really was easier than it ever has been. Was it depression? Or just hormones?

One day, I found a poster with this poem, in an antique store. I remember thinking I'd better buy it for myself because no one else ever would. So I did. I hung it on the back of my bedroom door and it had such a major impact on how I thought of myself. It helped me focus on myself. It made me feel better about things.

I saw it online this morning and was reminded of those times. I'm not a new age self-helper by no means, but I think saying these words out loud wouldn't be such a bad way to start a Sunday morning. Or maybe every Sunday morning.

Or even every morning for the rest of your life...

I am me.

 

In all the world, there is no one exactly like me. 

There are persons who have some parts like me, 

but no one adds up exactly like me.

Therefore, everything that comes out of me 

is authentically mine because I alone choose it.

I own everything about me

my body including everything it does;

my mind including all its thoughts and ideas;

my eyes including the images all they behold;

my feelings whatever they may be ...

anger, joy, frustration, love, disappointment, excitement

my mouth and all the words that come out it

polite, sweet or rough,

correct or incorrect;

my voice loud or soft. 

And all my actions, whether they be to others or to myself.

I own my fantasies, my dreams, my hopes, my fears. 

I own all my triumphs and successes, 

all my failures and mistakes. 

Because I own all of me I can become intimately acquainted with me. 

By doing so I can love me and be friendly with me in all parts. 

I can then make it possible for all of me to work in my best interests.

I know there are aspects about myself that puzzle me, 

and other aspects that I do not know. 

But as long as I am friendly and loving to myself, 

I can courageously and hopefully, look for solutions to the puzzles 

and for ways to find out more about me.

However I look and sound, whatever I say and do, and whatever I think 

and feel at a given moment in time is me. 

This is authentic and represents where I am in that moment in time. 

When I review later how I looked and sounded, what I said and did, and how I 

thought and felt, some parts may turn out to be unfitting. 

I can discard that which is unfitting, and keep that which proved fitting, 

And invent something new for that which I discarded.

I can see, hear, feel, think, say and do. 

I have the tools to survive, to be close to others, to be productive, 

and to make sense and order out of the world of people 

and things outside of me. 

I own me, and therefore I can engineer me.

I am me and I am okay.

© Virginia Satir, 1975. 

Found in Virginia Satir, Self Esteem, Celestial Arts: California, 1975.